Prospects of Working For a Dynasty in the Industry

I’ve been at my current job for almost 2 years. What do I do, you ask? I’m an administrative assistant (aka secretary) for a small community college branch in an impoverished area. 1/3 of the people I work with (as in coworker/bosses) are absolutely amazing and the other 2/3 are awful. Very catty old women who went to school together and don’t quite get along and they pull me and my cool coworker into the middle of it all, trying to cause drama.

It’s great. Fantastic. Absolutely lovely. A real pleasure.

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Needless to say, I’ve been looking for another job. I’ve been lurking on sites like indeed.com and linkedin for a couple months now like a Slovenian model looking for her Trump. There hasn’t been anything of real interest popping up, especially anything that my level of skills could handle. That is, until now.

Like seeing a pool of water in a desert, I fell to my knees and kissed the gross carpet, crying uncontrollably like a newborn baby that just got its ass smacked for no reason. I did it, I finally found what I’ve been looking for, something that would make me so happy and so full of life again.

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A receptionist (aka secretary) for Nintendo of America in Redmond, Washington. I can do everything that it’s asking for! Plus, I love Nintendo games! Dude, I got this. But then again, I’m sure 100+ other people do too. But you know why I’m the best candidate? Because I WILL DO ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING TO MAKE THIS HAPPEN.

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I was reading up on current and previous employee’s experiences working for the company. There was a lot of good and some bad which is normal, but all the good seems very exciting. Here’s the basic rundown of pros and cons that I gathered:

+ They give out 2 bonuses a year! / – That’s likely on a freeze right now.

+ They have a monthly raffle to stay at a house in Hawaii! / – No con.

+ Good benefits package! / – Not sure if there’s a pension. I’ve read that they have it and that they don’t.

+ PTO is accrued by paycheck! / – Apparently people would rather have it given to them in a lump sum (Uh, no…I like accruing things) (HOARDER!!!)

+ Be in a really geeky area of Washington state, close to Penny-Arcade, Bungie, ArenaNet!!! / – Traffic probably sucks balls.

+ All dat networking tho! / – No con. Or all the cons? Hur hur, I mean conventions.

+ They have a gym! And tennis courts! And a soccer field! / – I would have to exercise probably.

+ It’s NINTENDO!!!! / – It’s Nintendo….but how is that bad?

Either way, I’m not in any position to be picky when it comes to possibly working in an industry I love. I’m sitting here with my toes, fingers, and eyes crossed hoping that they will give me a shout. I know I can do it. I know I can blow their socks off with my cuteness and secretarial skills.

I believe in you, Nintendo. I believe that you will make the right choice and a golden light will surround my application and you’ll accept the quest of hiring me.

That sounds like it kind of entails some grueling work, but I don’t mean it that way. I’m so easygoing! And chill and laid back. I don’t know how many other ways I can put that. Plus I get my work done!

So, Nintendo, here’s my direct message to you:

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What I’m Learning From Dark Souls

To begin with, let me start by saying that despite the number of hours clocked into my game, I’m only past the second boss. I’ve put 16.2 hours in it so far according to Steam. The ratio of hours played and actual progression is extremely lopsided. And disgusting.

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In case you were living under a rock (just as I was until 2 or so weeks ago), you might not know that Dark Souls is an extremely infuriating game. It is brutal, unforgiving, it rips your heart to shreds every 5 minutes and maybe, just maybe, it’ll force that one tear out of your eye. Maybe you’ll have a broken controller or just a broken heart. Realistically though, it’ll be both. Scratch that, it’s all of the above.

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For a game that is so extreme, it’s no wonder that it has such a huge following. Dark Souls really forces you to think about your options and not to rush into things like Leroy Jenkins. As the old saying goes, there are many ways to skin a cat. In this case, your soul and wellbeing is the cat.

But really, there are a lot of tactics and strategies that need to be considered when going into a new area. Yea, if you’re a newbie like me, you’re going to die continuously. 15.5 of those 16.2 hours you spent in that game will literally be the screen that says you died and then about 5-10 minutes of ugly face crying and pleading to all deities that have ever been known for just a little fucking help. (Do they listen? No.)

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Luckily for players like me, there are other players that are actually good at this game. They have numerous walkthrough videos on YouTube and if you’re streaming your play through on Twitch, I bet you’ll have at least one or two players helping you out. I do and I wouldn’t be nearly as far as I am without them. Honestly, if it wasn’t for them, I’d have given up long ago. There’s a certain kind of camaraderie among the players of Dark Souls. Everyone knows your pain and frustration and have been in your shoes at least 20 times on that one level or boss.

Dark Souls is about perseverance and thinking your way through tough situations. It’s all about critical thinking and getting your timing down, especially when attacking and blocking. And for god’s sake, watch where you’re walking. Ledges, man…they will literally ruin your day.

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Ultimately, the Dark Souls series is a tough sonuvabitch. It will make you rage like no other, but it will also make you feel so happy. Yes, you died in that exact spot so many times that you lost count. But after the 23rd or 50th time of attempting it, you get past it and reach that glorious bonfire. You get congratulated by those that are watching because they’re so happy that they don’t have to watch that same 10 minutes play out over and over again like Groundhog’s Day. You probably actually learned something new about the game which in itself is amazing considering that it’s nowhere near intuitive or player friendly.

Dark Souls is amazing. It’s a game that will provide that love-hate relationship that you’ve been longing for and you didn’t know it yet. I recommend this series to anyone and everyone that’s a gamer. It doesn’t matter if you’re casual or hardcore, these games will improve your abilities, and you might even make some friends.

If you ever want to watch me struggle and live the dream (nightmare), follow me on Twitch where I’ll be streaming the first Dark Souls for probably a long time.

http://www.twitch.tv/lilmongoose

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Why It’s Hard Being A Female Gamer…Or Geek, Really

I love videogames. Seriously, if I could marry an industry, it would be gaming. I would be so good to it, giving it all my time and attention and praising its constant good work, and I would expect it to praise me in return and thank me for hours of selfless devotion. Relationship goals. It’s really that simple.

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Sadly, I cannot marry the gaming industry. But what I can do (and am doing) is having a very promiscuous and exciting affair. I’m hopping from platform to platform playing multiple games at once and I honestly haven’t felt so satisfied as I am now in a long time.

Except for one thing. It’s been bugging me lately and I feel like a lot of other women can feel me on this.We’re not gamers. That’s right, I said it! There’s no way in hell we can be gamers.  I guess it could be because we have tits and vaginas and that automatically disqualifies us from being recognized as a true member of this beautiful forum/media.

I admit, I may be just a little bitter about this.

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More recently within the past year I’ve had more time and opportunities to get back into gaming, as well as being able to fund my habit. I have built a beast of a PC with a small but decently sized library of games courteous to Steam as well as a nice streaming setup, I have a couple handhelds, 3 consoles, and a plethora of old and new games. Honestly, that isn’t very much and I do have several wish lists on Amazon of things that I would love to add to it. Occasionally, I do make my way over to Best Buy or Hastings to curb my cravings and pick up a new title or 3 and head home with extra pep in my step.

Well, that would be the ideal scenario. Instead, I get comments or dismissed as another girlfriend buying stuff for her boyfriend or brother. Or maybe that I’m buying stuff for my kid (WTF, do I look like a mom to you?).

For instance, I was with my best friend, who is a guy, at Best Buy and I was purchasing Mortal Kombat X for the PS4. I had seen a lot of gameplay of it and it looked like a lot of fun and I wanted in on the action. So there I am, walking like Leo DiCaprio in his Inception meme to the register. The lady working the front calls me over and she takes the game from me and releases it from it’s plastic cage and rings me up. Well that’s all fine and dandy with me, I prefer not doing that same ‘ol small talk banter bullshit. I just want to get home and pop that bad boy into my PS4 and wreck my thumbs on combos.

Nah, it’s not going to go that way. She looks at me and says:

“Aww, are you buying this for your boyfriend?”

“Uhh, no, actually it’s for-“

“Oh, for your son! Yea, my son begged me for this game too, but I wouldn’t get it for him. It’s too violent! I bet your son thinks you’re a good mom 🙂 “

“Haha, no, it’s for me. I’ve been a fan of the MK series since I was a kid actually.”

“Oh. Have a nice day.”

…Really? I don’t think it’s uncommon for there to be girl gamers. Especially those that are in their mid- to late-twenties. Is it really so strange that I would want a violent game where I can disembowel people with glee? Or uppercut people in the dick with some One Punch Man force?

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And it doesn’t end there. Maybe this is encroaching more into the general geekdom, but I know I’m not the only girl that has been told/asked about her “boyfriend’s” shirts. Simply put, I like nerdy/geeky t-shirts, especially those revolving around my favorite games/gamers/fandoms. Yes, I have given some of them to my best friend because he really liked them. Every time he wears one out in public, he gets all the comments! That’s cool, and I’m being serious about that. But when I wear it, it’s fucking silent. Or:

“Hey man, I like your shirt” while they are pointing at me but looking at him.

No, hombre, it doesn’t work that way. If I’m wearing this shirt/hoody/ANYTHING geeky and/or nerdy, it’s because I’m into it. It’s not because I didn’t have a clean shirt and asked my “boyfriend” to wear his.

Here’s the thing. I’m in the generation that grew up with videogames, cartoons, and anime. And outside. But really, we all wanted to be inside gaming, admit it. Have you ever played rock wars? Get this, it’s a game you do outdoors! Essentially you’re in the middle of the gravel road with your two older brothers and they throw rocks at you! It was a great way to learn how to dodge. Great times, I tell you.

All that I want today is for there to be more support for female gamers/geeks/nerds. Don’t assume that we’re running errands for a guy or wearing some dude’s clothes. Instead, ask us what we think about whatever we’re buying/wearing! Sure, there might be a few people who are just running errands or borrowing clothes and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that. But all the other times, I guarantee that we would love to have a conversation about it. We do know our shit! Give us a little credit and some props because honestly, we’re just like you. We love what we love and if given the chance, we’ll brag and talk for days about it.

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